Wednesday, February 6, 2008

I'm No Masochist

I smell of the hospital. I cannot manage to wash the smell out of my hair. I don't know what kind of fluids live on my stethoscope. Not a single day has passed in which I did not have blood fall on some exposed part of my body. The house surgeons treat us like their personal slaves. The PG students act like we exist solely for them to vent their frustration. The teachers pretend we don't exist. Out of the 12 hours I spend in that bloody place, I sit down only to eat. I don't know what day it is. I think I have another week in the LR left. Time has lost all meaning. And people want to know why I hate the labour room.

All of us are giving way under the strain. Many talk in their sleep. A couple were bitten by the God bug. Me, I just lose my temper over small things. Like my mom switching off the light in my room because she thought I was in another room. I threw a tantrum that day. And kicked at everything that was lighter than my body weight. Oh, and that reminds me of another funny thing. Ha ha. My weight has hit an all time low in 6 years because I don't have time to eat.

I can't stand many of my fellow interns now. I hate slackers who expect the rest of the world to do their jobs. Only, the rest of the world happens to be me. Even my inner workaholic is overworked. Pulse, BP, results, monitoring, consents, blood, foetal monitor, pitocin, cannula, Ringer's lactate, transfusion reaction, non stress tests, contraction stress tests, partographs, catheterisation, injection, placenta, prostaglandins, leggings, post partum haemorrhage, apron, abruptio placentae, pre-term labour, gestational hypertension, obstructed labour, twins, pre-eclampsia, forceps, vacuum, gloves, infusion sets, normal saline, foetal hypoxia, post natal monitoring, couvelaire uterus, hepatitis B, unmarried primis, premature rupture of membranes, second trimester abortions, intra uterine death, neonatal deaths, cleft palate, TORCH complex anomalies... I've had enough.

I think I'll go see what hara-kiri feels like. It's bound to be less painful than this.


Anonymous said...

Hello I just entered before I have to leave to the airport, it's been very nice to meet you, if you want here is the site I told you about where I type some stuff and make good money (I work from home): here it is

the stygian sailor said...

looks like you work in a birth factory.
you forgot LSCS, contracted pelvis, episiotomies into the drakness of the world, forceps, ventouse etc

Don Lewis said...

Hey! I just got a blood blister from opening a bottle of beer!

So don't think you've got all the troubles.

ToOothlEss WOndeR! said...

i'm on vacation.
I still attend 3hrs of meeting-on-the-phone every day, and i had to drop a movie half-way twice in this one week.
miserable as hell myself - company helps, doesnt it? :)

Ziah said...

Awwww!:) You sound like you're livin the Bombay life:)

Tys on Ice said...

hey ap, if u lose any more weight, u will be invisible if seen, tht wud be spooky..

look at the bright side, u can whack those lil bums harder if it makes u feel better :)

Parul said...


I think you need a holiday (read :a boyfriend who can take all your tantrums and cynicism so that you can be good to the rest of the world)!!


Adorable Pancreas said...

@barb michelen:
Leaving so soon? I'll miss you. *sniff*

@the stygian sailor:
How could I forget those? My brain must have suffered more damage than I thought.

@don lewis:
My troubles paled in comparison to yours. I hope you didn't die.

@toothless wonder:
My friend of misery!

Everyone does this in Bombay? remind me never to go there, then.

@tys on ice:
I'm on the road to invisibility. Which will give a whole new meaning to "I'm waiting to see the doctor."
It's nurses who whack the li'l bums. We whack the mother if she screams too loud.

I do, I do. Where do I get one?

monsoon-dreams said...

but,isnt labour room posting interesting?