Saturday, October 6, 2007

Not Again

I got this SMS yesterday.
"The SPM exam to be held on 11th has been preponed* to the 9th."
That's when I knew an exam had been scheduled for the 11th.
&%#@*!$

SPM stands for Sleep Producing Medicine, known in some places as PSM, Pain of Studying Medicine. Because of these flattering expansions, the Social and Preventive Medicine people have changed their name to Department of Community Medicine. We, the tortured, continue to call it SPM, of course.

The ENT people are away at some conference, and there are no classes for a couple of days. I have plenty of time to drown in the Park (that's our SPM textbook), but somehow, I can't do it. Exemplifies my innate laziness perfectly.

This SMS did the rounds a few months back.
Life of an MBBS student:
Kapde hai, Pressed nahi
Wallet hai, Paise nahi
Lecture hai, Attendance nahi
Mobile hai, balance nahi
Friends hai, Girlfriend nahi
Exam hai, Tension nahi
Padhna hai, Mood nahi.
For the Hindi challenged, the rough translation looks something like this:
We’ve got plenty of clothes, but they aren’t ironed
We have wallets, but they have no money in them
We have lectures, but not enough attendance
We have mobile phones, but there’s no balance
We have friends, but no girlfriend
We have exams, but we aren’t tensed
We have lots to study, but we aren’t in the mood to.
This also illustrates the simplicity of Hindi, but that's beside the point.

I have to go study mug up the subject (understanding it is beyond my capabilities) now. I hope all the dust on the book won't make me snore.

*I know there is no such word, but hey, this is India. We speak our own brand of English.

11 comments:

Tys on Ice said...

Aww Ap, is there anything worse that a postponed pain? just whn u hve focused all ur being to get it over with, u r told tht the detah sentence is being rescheduled...i feel for u..

Spunky Monkey said...

We call it Community Health, for "the subject goes beyond medicine". Like, into toilet dimensions and such.
Park! What a collection of aphorisms that one is.
He cites "unusual behaviour of men and animals" in developing countries as being among the reasons why road traffic accidents are more here. WTF?
Also, it is probably the only subject where I made the most number of acronyms.
U and I R SIMIlar, we listen to AC/DC, we're both FICkle..was National Population Policy 2000.
All Europen-American-Foreign Women want ME, I think was the Planning Cycle.
I remember other such wonders like, No Westerner Can Sing A Carnatic Bhajan, and How Cruel! Poor Ethiopian School Children Shudder. What randomness.

I hated HATED HATED that subject. Enough to write about it. Go see if you haven't already.
http://venivididormi.blogspot.com/2007/04/now-people-do-not-blame-me-for-using.html

Spunky Monkey said...

I think Blogger is acting up, or I just suck at this thing.
It's in April, that wondrous piece of writing.

Ajith said...

Now I think life of a medico is not that different from the life of an engineering student .. :)

Ziah said...

Aww AP!! Community Medicine sounds like.. erm.. labour law... it kinda went into toilet dimensions, his n hers..:) We all go thru it, come out and think why-the-eff we went in the first place... some kinky evolution shit..:)

There there.. there will be light..:)

Keshi said...

I rem my Uni days everytime I come to ur blog....urrggggggg Im so glad they r over :) But hey these r ur fun days too...so enjoy hun!

**SPM

Can I hv some of those meds plz?


Keshi.

ToOothlEss WOndeR! said...

Flash floods and flash tests:
We would have loved both. The first, beacause we wouldnt have to bunk* (a holiday earned is a day not bunked), and the second
because that way we wouldnt be the only. ones to crap out.
:)

*There:An addition to your list.

Sreejith said...

i seriously don't get the point behind medicos writing exams. If someone comes to a medic with broken bones, you wouldn't want the doc to write an essay answer na! Shouldn't docs be judged by the number of patients they managed not to kill? :P

Bullshee said...

Preponed is not grammatically correct??Then what do you call something that has been...well....preponed???

Is post poned grammatically correct?

Adorable Pancreas said...

@tys on ice:
I found out today that they'll be giving tests every other week. Got a tissue?

@spunky monkey:
55 degrees slope, isn't it? The only subject I truly hate. Not even anatomy deserves that envied status. We used to have Talented Doctors Are Never Hungry and for something in the lower limb. SPM seems to call for talents in the toilet.
Uh, same pinch! I hate it too. Might do a post too.
I read it. :))

@ajith:
:) But you didn't have to put up with SPM. Bleugh.

@ziah:
It's illegal if the toilet slopes less than 55 degrees? Whoa!
Mine's a tube light, apparently. :(

@keshi:
Are you insomniac? here you go, take one page of Park's textbook of preventive and social medicine, 5 minutes going to bed. :)

@toothless wonder:
Oh, yeah. I'd missed that one. :)
Flash tests, we never have any of those. I used to think that was a good thing.

@sreejith:
Would you like to discuss this with the Indian Council of Medicine? They won't listen to me after a certain mishap involving a skull and a prostate.

@bullshee:
Errr.... un-postponed? :P

Hershey Desai said...

DAMN! Nothing worse than a preponed exam... except maybe..not knowing about the test in the first place.

sleep producing medicine... EVIL! No amount of that shall lull me to sleep. For I am Hershey! THE CAFFEINE MAN!

anyway, eek..wait..foot fell asleep..oh lord the tingling sensation is unbearable.




ah..finally.
hmm....this is nice. People aren't so different after all. Such a striking relevation. The life of an MBBS student is just as @#$%^# up as the life of an engineering student.